This week I experienced—firsthand—the uncanny entanglements of quantum physics.

I was looking for a list of the top toys of 2020 when I discovered a game—the most perfect game in the history of the universe:

It was, of course, the Pop! Funkoverse Golden Girls Expandalone Strategy Game!

This was an A+++++ gift for my husband—that man who loves games AND loves The Golden Girls.

But that’s not the quantum physics part.

It all happened when I clicked “order.” As happens with exciting things like this, Time began undergoing entanglements, and it slowed to a viscous molasses.

I waited and waited and waited. Everyone else in the universe marched along normally, wrinkling along like fated raisins, while my life simply hung in the void, frozen in time.

Then, finally, the Amazon package arrived, and I thought I could present Christoph with this unique gift on camera. We changed out of our pajamas (very rare these days!), and proceeded with our usual YouTube routine:

• pilates workout

• steam bath

• Bel Air blowout

• massage

• Korean facial

• makeup

• manicure

• pedicure

• voice exercises

• photo shoot

• Zoom with Ellen

• “unscripted” TMZ interview

Then we sat down in our chairs and clicked “record.”

The camera was dead.

Our lights were dead.

And most of all, Time was dead.

So we waited some more.

And then…

Then finally the universe DID cooperate (way to go, Big Guy!) and Time readjusted herself. (And my wrinkles not only caught up to those of my human peers but in fact surpassed them. Thanks, physics.)

And so I presented this best gift of 2020 to my husband, and I hope you’ll watch his genuine reaction in the video above.

Unfortunately the enthusiasm was short-lived…

Ok, so we’re dumb as two boxes of rocks (or diamonds, depending on your perspective).

Fair enough, but the directions to this game were absolutely agonizing. Without the help of Einstein himself, we couldn’t make heads or tails of it.

Nonetheless, we’re bound and determined to figure it out and get back to you… In the meantime, we’ll be hanging out on Hulu and streaming more of Dorothy, Blanche, Sophia, and Rose. Oh, and the cute figurines now have a permanent home in our studio. Time withstanding.